#1 Everything won’t always be SO terrible. #2 You’ll lose friends, but you’ll gain ones too. #3 Time will speed up. #4 The obsession with death lessens. #5 You’ll find what works for you. #6 And what doesn’t. #7 You will have set backs. #8 And that’s okay. #9 People are still mean. #10 Guilt […]
Author: Amy Buckley
I signed cards for my twin after she died.
Grief makes you do weird things. For example, signing cards for a loved one who has died. Wait, pause real quick. I shouldn’t say it’s “weird.” In fact, I think it’s actually quite common and “normal,” whatever “normal” is anyways. Maybe a better way to say it is that grief makes you do things you […]
You’re So Young, You Don’t Get It
How many times has someone said this to you in conversation? Conversations that are not necessarily about death or anything “serious” for that matter. Opinions start to come out, words get stronger and then there it goes, “But you’re so young, you just don’t get it.” Most of the time, it’s said with a scoff […]
Easier doesn’t mean Easy
In my opinion, yes, the grief journey does get “easier.” But is it the grief that gets “easier” or do we just “get more used to it?” I think there are multiple answers. I think we change. I think we adapt. I think we learn how to live without our loved one(s). I think we […]
Death Anniversary – A Griever’s Point of View
I’m writing this on my identical twin’s 11th death anniversary. I can’t believe it. I truly can’t believe it’s been 11 years. At times it feels like it was just yesterday and other times, it feels like it was a lifetime ago. Death anniversaries are weird. They’re uncomfortable. They’re sad. They’re draining. They’re dark. And […]
Toxic Positivity
Despite being relatively active on Instagram, I’ve really been lacking on the blog posts. This past February I had an encounter on my Instagram account that bothered me. I wouldn’t say it’s the sole reason that I haven’t made a blog post since, but I would say it certainly contributed to it (along with many […]
The 5 Stages of Grief Helped Me
Unpopular opinion: I’m not against the “five stages of grief.” The majority of grief advocates argue against the use of the five stages of grief and while I agree with many of their points, I don’t fully agree with getting rid of “the five stages” altogether. *Side note: The argument is that grief cannot be […]
I’m Sorry You’re Sorry
When someone dies, people around that person often feel guilty (along with every other emotion ever felt). We feel guilt after a death for many reasons. Sometimes we wish we could’ve done something more to prevent it. Sometimes we wish we would’ve spent more time with that person or told them that we love them […]
10 Years
It’s 9:30PM on January 9, 2021. My kids are asleep and the day is nearly over. I’m usually asleep by now, but I find myself unable to close my eyes. Today marks 10 years since my identical twin’s sudden and tragic passing. As I lay here reflecting, I feel a multitude of emotions, as you […]
The First Thanksgiving
No, I’m not referring to the 1621 harvest gathering between the Native Americans and the Pilgrims. Instead, I’m going to be discussing the first Thanksgiving after significant loss. Despite having already gotten through a few holidays in The First Year after my loss, Thanksgiving felt like the first “big” holiday I would have to navigate […]